Dream With Fear or Faith?

"Faith will take you where fear won't let you go."

That was the title of the sermon my Auntie Joyce preached. To say it has stuck with me for the better part of two months now would be quite the understatement. When I began attempting to live by this statement and apply it not just spiritually but to every other avenue of my life, I realized something about myself. This entire year I've been held captive to fear instead of free in faith. The doubts, insecurities, second guessing, and underestimating myself was just a self inflicted tactic produced by fear to set me back--that's how I look at it anyway.

I touched on this briefly in a previous post but I didn't spend too much time expressing my innermost feelings and all that jazz. Essentially, this year I put off the querying process simply because I was fearful that I would have a repeat of my last run. Even though during that time I was less experienced, less knowledgeable, busy going to college and juggling two jobs, and my novel had not undergone that serious nip and tuck sort of revision. I was pretty much just a little bitty baby novice and now well...it's been two years. I should know a little something by now, right? Lol and I do.

So in the past few months I've realized that in any situation, not just writing wise, if I wait until I deem myself absolutely ready to do something then I'll be waiting for the rest of my life. Not many people are ever ready to launch out into what they consider the deep and dark part of the waters, but the launching has the take place some time or another. Whether you're facing difficult circumstances concerning career/education goals, financial setbacks, personal goals, family issues, challenging relationships, or just dealing with the usual curve balls life tends to throw at you keeping a positive mindset is key. It may be easier said than done, but it's true. Folks with big dreams need to recognize that struggles and disappointments are inevitable but discouragement and quitting is a choice.

But I'm human. We all are. So sometimes I get down and wonder if my dream career as a YA and new adult fiction writer will ever come to pass. Will I ever have a final revision that's good enough? Will my critique partners ever say "don't change a thing"? And why does success have to take so doggone long? And these questioning and doubt then transforms into outright fear. When that moment comes for me to shine or present my work, I get timid. Why? Because I don't want to hear the harsh criticism. Or I'm afraid a person will tear it to pieces.

But frankly, I'm sick of being scared. Screw fear. I'm operating on faith now. And I've told myself before that I have faith that things will work out and yada yada yada, but it wasn't until the concept of "faith will take you where fear won't let you go" that it actually sunk in. I just sat down one day and made a list of the results of fear and the results of faith. It is shared below.

FEAR

Suppresses our thinking and behavior

Limits creativity

Develops bad habits & stress

Weakens our resolve

Cripples growth

Robs peace & happiness

Limits prosperity

Chokes us with doubt

Creates procrastination

Causes insecurities

Defers dreams

Halts success

Undermines destiny

Lies

Regrets

Kills faith

FAITH

Invokes spiritual and intellectual growth
Motivates creativity to become artistry
Promotes positivity
Inherits promises & expectations
Strengthens our commitments
Cements your peace and happiness
Sees unmeasurable success
Creates belief in self
Demands action
Promotes truth and hope
Knows no doubt
Defends your unquestionable belief
Is a Free Thinker
Values loyalty

Instills curiosity and thirst for more
Kills FEAR

Crazy Sick Talk with my Characters

I want to blame my two week absence on the Cardinals disgracing my city and losing in the World Series (grrrrrr, talk about devastation to the core...and a waste of money on all that daggone party food!), but I've been incredibly sick and am finally starting to feel like myself again. Bronchitis, sinusitis, and a stomach virus all decided to ransack me simultaneously. I've never experienced such a sucky sickness in my entire life...but then again I always say that when I'm sick. Just like I always say "this is the best cake I've had in my entire life" whenever I eat great cake.

And yanno', I swear teaching grade school children is like a death trap. The little sweetums are always sick! And they aren't very good at grabbing a tissue versus their sleeve, covering their coughs, using hand sanitizer, and the like. Yet I still adore them and their potent germs.

So, whilst laying up like a dead woman I had loads of time to talk to my characters, fantasize about perfect future scenarios (believe me, all ladies in their 20s do this) and read the Bible...while feeling a tad guilty for taking notes for my novel instead of my personal journal but hey, stuff happens. Jesus knows I totally love Him and will spend extra time with Him this week. Anyway, back to the characters bit...

Obviously I've done the whole character sketches, picking through their personalities, appearance, traits, habits and so on, and simply letting them take up residence in my head while I listen and observe. As well, I've been through the interviewing, discovering, and analyzing processes.

Essentially, I know my folks pretty well....but I still like to talk to them. Sometimes they talk to one another. Or I envision them meeting my family and friends. I make up fun, sad, serious, dangerous, happy, ridiculous, or whatever situations and sort out how each of my characters would respond or say in such circumstances. Is that too eccentric? Am I the only one who enjoys the company of their own characters or should I say further exploring them? Good Lord...that sounds a bit psycho for folks who don't understand fiction writing, but it's the truth for me.

If I tell you I was the only person holed up in my bedroom while I was sick I'd be telling you a boldfaced lie. One night I even fell asleep talking to my characters and proceeded to have a dream about them with me in it! And HELLO! Let's just say I totally have a crush on the male love interest in my book now. I'm just sayin! Logan is a charmer in person....or in dream, whatever. No wonder he's a lady killer. But anyway yeah. It. Was. Freaking. AWESOME! My imagination was on overload during this sickness and no lie...my characters made it fly by so fast. I now possess a greater love for them because they kept me company when no other human being wanted to be around sick ole' contagious me. And below is how I feel about those people now, hmph! ;-)

Can anyone else relate to me here? Am I the only one who treats my characters like living, breathing, running around, having a good time real folks?

What Makes a Good Villain?

Look, I'm not going to give a lengthy introduction here. I'm not about to justify nor delve into the many eccentricities of me. You guys know by now that I'm a pretty unconventional girl. So, I'm just going to throw it out there without attempting to give an explanation beforehand...but I sort of just did give an explanation, huh? Eh well.

I like villains.

I fall for the bad guy.
The darker and dangerous the better.
I don't give a darn if he's a stone cold killer.
I'm down for the sick and twisted crazy ride (just kidding, mom).

Yeah, I'm that girl. But this only applies to the marvelous world of fiction we find in totally awesome novels, comic books, films, shows, and what not. There is no way I would ever associate with a psychopathic scoundrel in my real life. I don't have a thing for illustrious miscreants and I sure won't ever give into the charms of a handsome serpent rocking a dazzling smile and....well, moving right along...heh heh.

Essentially, I have much admiration for writers who can humanize a villain that well. The sort who can cause their readers to develop sympathy for the treacherous monster causing all kinds of chaos. I'm talking about a writer who has the ability to mask a character's wickedness so well that the reader forgets and sometimes don't even care how evil the character is. They start rooting for the character.

That's how I am. My mother hates it--and she will probably hate this post too. She doesn't understand how I can be a nice (sometimes), saved good church girl (lol) and have a fascination with things I should really abstain from. I know, I know, I know...pray for me.

But really it's not that bad. My salvation is not in jeopardy. I think it's normal, actually. Honestly, how many people do you know absolutely LOVE Bellatrix Lestrange? I loved her from the moment she was introduced in the Harry Potter series. She has such character and her very essence is simply magical and graceful yet deranged and sickening. And yes, I did mourn the loss of Sirius Black...but I still loved Bellatrix! The same goes for The Joker, Cruella de Vil, Valentine, Dark Phoenix, Magneto, Voldemort, Dracula, Hannibal, Loki, Klaus...and the list goes on and on my dear friends.

I just think it's awesome, you know? And I believe this is an ability that every writer who wants to be successful in the publishing world (in the appropriate genre, of course) should have. Readers hate the stereotypical and mundane villains whose actions are totally predictable and eye roll worthy. Readers want villains who are unpredictable. Villains who are smart, crafty, has potential and great ideas, and are motivated. Readers dig rebels with a cause. And man...villains with a troublesome past? They take the cake.

Really guys, even Lucifer has a past. The villain of all villains! The guy was the favored angel in heaven head over the choir and he gave it all up simply for a control he would never acquire, a ridiculous amount of unnecessary envy, and crazy greed. That's one heck of a past. He had a father, no THE FATHER, a family, a marvelous place to call home...but something happened.

Something always happens, right? That's what readers like-that something that causes the villain to change. And I'm talking before he/she is actually deemed a villain. And although I detest Satan and he is one villain I would never play patty cake with....the dude has a past, present, and future. If you want to create a successful villain start by reading the Bible. There is so much good in there, of course, but it also tells of the evil side. Learning about that true evil--the very birth of it--has caused me to write villains a lot better. They all take after the devil anyway, right?

And by the way....Satan sucks to the utmost. Jesus rocks. Just thought I'd throw that out there, lol. Don't want you guys thinking I'm some psycho devil lover or anything. I'm all for God, folks. I just can get caught up with the villains in stories I read. ;-)

Brainstom. Outline. Organize. Write.

I'm not going to lie.
I'm a bit scatterbrained.
I know, I know, I know.
What can I say? Stuff happens.
Heck, blame the bloodline.

Externally, I'm a pretty neat and tidy person. My living quarters stay clean. I don't like messy areas. I hate weird odors. I can't cook or bake in a disgusting kitchen. I like my hair and makeup a certain way. I just like a nice, sweet candle scented area that also happens to be immaculate. Can you blame me?

But on the inside...honey baby chiiilllddd, I am a stanky hot mess. Especially when my creative juices flow. I'm talking ideas crashing into one another. Light bulbs exploding here and there. Ah ha! Moments popping up like freaking grasshoppers. No lie, it's nuts.

During the brainstorming phase of producing ideas for my novel I jotted down notes on whatever was available--phone, laptop, napkin, whatever. Those notes consisted of major details about my characters, the premise, difficulties to overcome, plot twists, main events, and so on. This exercise typically occurred after my college classes at a local café I frequented. Yes, I worked on my novel instead of writing a paper or studying for an exam. Bad student, I know. After enough brainstorming I really tried to get an idea of the desires I had for my novel. The themes, genre, target audience, how events will affect my characters, what will the setting be, do I want to make a career out of this and so on.

Then came my outline phase. I did a bit of research and learned not all writers feel the need to create outlines before diving into the actual writing of the manuscript. Some writers prefer an outline simply to have a guide. Something that will keep them on track without limiting their novel's possibilities, of course. It's perfectly okay to make changes to the outline whilst writing. It's normal to get more or better ideas when you really get into your story.

Now organizing my outline was pretty simple....well, kind of. First I went into deep detail for each of my characters. Then I listed their names again and provided short sentences, no more than 15 words, for each along with a possible quote. I spent a lot of time on my characters because I know a great fiction book is character driven. Sucky Characters = Sucky Book. Honestly, have you heard of The Joker? Pure awesomeness. I then expanded on the premise, setting, stakes, plot, definitions for certain artifacts, terms, or special items.

And really, a novel outline is just like a long list of stuff needing an explanation. That's it. Not all writers must create an outline before the actual writing, but I do simply because I like to hurry up and get my ideas into a saved document. And at the time I was a beginner. And like I said before, it's not mean to limit your novel's possibilities or restrict your creativity, it's just a guide. Like an organized tool to help you along the way. You don't have to stick with it. There is nothing in the heavenly sent writer's rulebook that states you cannot make changes to your outline.

After all this I felt comfortable enough to start writing. And what's so beautiful is that I wrote my entire novel within months. I was so excited and gung-ho about the whole thing that I cranked out 160k words in less than one semester of college. If I wasn't working, in class, or doing homework my face was glued to the laptop screen with my fingers typing away. Now, I wasn't that excited when the revision stages began but hey, it is what it is.

So that's how the writing of my novel started. I brainstormed, outlined, organized my ideas, and got down to writing. It's okay to spend a lot of time on those first three stages but you have to start writing some time. Don't get too hooked on making your outline perfect, it's not that big of a deal. Like I said, it's just a tool to help you stay on track and keep your ideas from being forgotten.

How to Cut Your Novel--Five Steps

Your Manuscript Is...

--Way too long
--Contains too much filler
--Extremely wordy
--In dire need of cutting
--Overly descriptive
--Has unnecessary backstory
--Full of unneeded adjectives

Folks, this is normal. If you're a writer then you've definitely heard at least one of these statements before. Whether it's from a critique partner, literary agent, editor, or even your dear old mum; believe me when I say they are correct. This sort of revising is simply part of every writer's life. It's just something that has to be done. About a year ago literary agent Vickie Motter told me to cut 60k of my book (I know. I was way over the limit) and it was the best advice I ever received. She didn't have to tell me that. Initially she rejected my query. I politely asked for feedback and she promptly responded to my email. She took the time out to address the concerns of a young novice. Not all agents do that. It rarely happens, really. It took me a bit of time, but this five step process below really helped me clean up my manuscript. Check it out.

Step One: Consult the Experts
- Don't be afraid to raid your bookshelf. Pick up some of your favorite books you share the same genre with and skim through them. Discover why you adore the book so much. What is it about the characters, wording, premise, and so on that keeps your eyes glued to the pages. Simply jot down some notes regarding what those books contain that perhaps yours doesn't. It's very simple, this step, and I find it extremely helpful.

Step Two: Read, Read, Read
- Read over your own manuscript and MAKE NO CHANGES YET. Highlight possible problem areas. Make short notes in the review/side margin.

Step Three: *Rubs Palms* Now Down to the Nitty Gritty
-Look for adverbs, mainly those ending with "y" and determine whether they're necessary.
-Were, That, Was....believe me, most of the time you don't even need those words. Passive=Ugh.
-Watch out for too descriptive paragraphs. The sort readers tend to skip or skim.
-Get those unnecessary adjectives under control. They can turn a really good line into an annoying one and even confusing one.
-Backstory--I guarantee you, nobody likes it in a book...unless it's like totally awesome though.

Step Four: Tell the Readers Something they DON'T KNOW
-Writers tend to give information the reader already knows. This is extremely annoying.
-Characters' thoughts can get really annoying, especially when they are repetitive and ridiculously long. This goes for monologues as well. Those can get boring very fast. And most of the time I find them unnecessary. Show the reader a story; provide a clear picture. Don't just tell them a tale.
-Don't let dialogue go on and on and on and repeat the same old information "just to make sure the reader understands." Believe me...they get it. They got it the first time.

Step Five: Perhaps I Missed Something
-Repeat the above at least 3x before handing it out again. You want to make sure the person who told you to cut your novel sees a major difference. Give them a Book Hangover. ;-)